After the initial shock of becoming a dad goes away, you're left with an interesting mix of excitement and pure terror. You've never been a parent before, so what are you supposed to do?
Here are some tips to help you prepare for fatherhood:
Never Underestimate Your Role.
Some fathers don't realize how important they are to their child's life, possibly because the first baby-related challenges of pregnancy, childbirth, and breastfeeding all focus on the mother. You are just as important to your baby's life as the mother!
You're going to have different approaches to parenting than mom will, and that's just what baby needs! It's great for children to experience different approaches. Mom may think you're playing rough or being too loud but the kids will love the different style you bring to playtime and downtime.
Be Involved with the Pregnancy.
Fatherhood starts the minute you find out you're going to have a baby. When your wife talks about morning sickness and puffy ankles, see what you can do to help her. Go with her to prenatal doctor's appointments. Take a childbirth class together. Set up the baby's room. Or just talk to the little one so he gets used to your voice, too.
Your wife's probably changed her diet and given up some bad habits. Let her know you are experiencing this with her and encourage a healthy pregnancy by making your own positive changes, like giving up smoking and eating more vegetables.
Talk About It.
Fathers have questions and concerns about pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting. Talk with your wife about how you feel, especially if you're feeling left out. Talk about what your role in the delivery room will be, and discuss what you'll both do when the baby first comes home.
Share your values, traditions, and how you want to raise your children together. Most important, don't be afraid to ask questions, and feel free to offer your opinions—after all, you're in this together. Developing good communication skills now will be very helpful as you try to manage life without a lot of sleep after the baby arrives!
Plan to Be There.
You don't have to know what to do in every situation. What's important is that you're there!
In America, more than 24 million children (34% of all children) don't live with their dad. When you hold your baby for the first time, you won't be able to imagine being without him/her. But when you and mom start to argue about diapers, household responsibilities, and everything else that parents juggle, you may wonder what you got yourself into.
One of the best ways to be a great dad is to invest time in your relationship with your spouse. Being involved with your baby and maintaining a healthy relationship with mom will give your child his best chance for success!
Prepare for the Changes.
Getting ready for baby is more than setting up the nursery. This is a time to think about your family budget, life insurance, the involvement of your parents and in-laws, taking time off work, and child care responsibilities—just to name a few! The more you do now to prepare for this life change, the easier the transition to parenthood will be. These are major decisions for you and your partner, and taking the time to plan and prepare together can reduce some of the stress a new baby can bring.
Conclusion
Being a father is one of the most important jobs you'll ever have, and it's normal to have concerns. Talk with your partner about how you're feeling, figure out the kind of dad you want to be, and then dive in and go for it. What your baby needs from you is "you," so don't worry about making mistakes.
Life & Love
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