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Deciding to be in an exclusive, committed relationship is a big step forward for any couple, but just because the first round of the dating obstacle course has been successfully navigated doesn’t mean it’s time to coast and take it easy. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Now is the time to really work on the relationship to ensure that it continues to strengthen and grow. Here are some things to consider:

Exclusive does not mean boring. Don’t allow you and your partner to fall into a routine that dulls the senses and in turn, makes the relationship less than appealing. Continually experiencing new things together (whether trying new dinner recipes or visiting someplace new once a month) will have the opposite effect and keep both members of the couple engaged in the relationship.

Maintain open and honest communication with your partner. Both partners should feel free to discuss hopes, dreams, problems, feelings and issues without fear of being ridiculed or belittled for those opinions. Communication is one of the most important aspects of any relationship, and couples need to feel comfortable discussing anything – good or bad – as well as being able to reach amicable solutions when problems do arise.

Be realistic. Do not expect your relationship to be perfect just because you’re exclusive. It’s unrealistic to think that just because you’ve entered into the ‘committed’ zone, you will no longer have arguments or difficulties. Exclusive relationships are constantly changing and evolving and require work to get past the bumps in the road. Dealing with disagreements in a healthy way will add to the long-term vitality and success of a relationship. Likewise, failing to deal with these issues will have a negative impact and can often end in the demise of the relationship.

Keep putting effort into the relationship. Just because you’re exclusive doesn’t mean you no longer need to put your best foot forward. Whether you’ve been together for six months or 60 years, all relationships have one thing in common: They require constant nurturing. If a relationship is not nurtured by both partners (just like the proverbial potted plant) it will shrivel up and die.

Honor an exclusive relationship by remaining faithful. This seems obvious because by definition an exclusive relationship means that both partners have agreed to a monogamous, committed relationship. So, if you find yourself teetering on infidelity, this is an indicator that there is something wrong. It’s important that you get to the root of the problem and realize why you are contemplating cheating on your partner. You should also decide if it is possible to solve the problem(s) and salvage the relationship. It may be that the problem is not fixable, but in most cases there is a way to repair a less-than-perfect aspect of a relationship. Out of respect to your partner (and yourself), you should make a decision about your relationship BEFORE you cheat! If you believe that the problems are insurmountable, have a conversation with your partner and end the relationship before pursuing something (or someone) else. Failure to do so will bring the relationship to a swift and painful end and can likely destroy any possibility of an amicable breakup.

Congratulations on your successful navigation of the dating world. Now that you have entered “committed and exclusive” territory, remember to move your relationship forward by:

• Keeping things new and exciting
• Remembering to communicate, communicate, communicate
• Letting go of unrealistic expectations
• Putting effort into the relationship, and
• Being faithful