Money may be one of the most common relationship stressors, but that doesn't mean you have to let it put a strain on your marriage. Nip financial woes in the bud early with the following tips:

Talk About It

Start your financial future on the right foot by sitting down with your spouse and talking about your finances. If you didn't do this while you were engaged, make sure this conversation happens as soon as possible! Discuss how much you make and what outstanding debts you have. Talk about your goals for the future and what you can do to get there. Talk about how you use credit cards and cash. Remember that you can't change the past. If your spouse doesn't agree with choices you made in past, don't waste time arguing about the "if only" situations. Keep your conversation aimed to the future. Finally, decide who will be the one to pay the bills and do the taxes. If you decide it's easier for one person to tackle this, set aside time every month for the two of you to talk about where you stand financially.

Combine Your Accounts (or Not)

The officiate may have united you for richer or poorer at your wedding but that doesn't mean you have to open a joint bank account. Decide whether you and your spouse want to combine your finances into one account, keep everything separate, or do a little of both by keeping your personal accounts and opening a joint account. Talk about the benefits of each scenario. There is a lot of trust involved in sharing your finances, so do not take this decision lightly. You may have come from a family where everything was held jointly, so that seems like the natural choice, but your partner may have experienced a different system that worked great. Choose whatever seems right for the two of you and the goals you have.

Create a Budget

Once you understand your family's finances, you need to create a budget that will help you pay your bills and reach your goals. Perhaps you want to buy a house, or maybe you want to retire early. Discuss where your money will go each month—a good rule of thumb is to live off 70% of your income and save the other 30%—and agree to ask the other before making a major purchase. Again, the key is to talk openly about your goals and expectations. What may be a "major purchase" to you may not be major to your spouse. Budgets are only as valuable as the categories they contain. If you haven't discussed what is a necessary expense (going out for dinner, getting a $40 hair cut, clipping coupons for groceries) it will be difficult to agree on a budget.

Eliminate Debt

Getting rid of your debt will help you meet your financial goals and go a long way toward reducing financial tension in your relationship. Sit down with your spouse and create a plan to eliminate (or reduce) your debt. This can be a very big goal for couples. You have to balance the debt with your other priorities. For example, if you decide that one of you wants to finish your education and take on debt to accomplish this goal, you have to commit to that goal together. You don't want to blame your partner down the road for taking on this debt for him/her. It has to be a joint decision.

Update Your Insurance

Contact your insurance company to update your martial status—you may be able to lower your premiums. If you each have a car, you may also gain benefits by combining policies. Compare your employer's health care plans to see if the family or spouse plan is better than your current individual plans. Consider buying (more) life insurance to cover your family's needs, as things change after you're married. Talk openly about these decisions, and make them jointly. Just because you're in love doesn't meant that you will agree on everything. These can be difficult decisions. The important thing is talking about your expectations and learning to compromise.

Conclusion

Communication and working together are the best gifts you can give you relationship. Talking with your spouse about your finances and goals will allow the two of you to continue to grow and thrive as a team.

Life & Love

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